Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Three Year Olds!




I am notorious for re-telling stories. You know, events that have happened, that brought a tear to my eyes, or a rumble of laughter. I'm about to re-tell a few that just deserve a blog about them.

There are so many happenings in raising our children to be recalled...

Randal (my son) three years old....
He had a bookcase headboard on his bed. He had every kind of hat you could imagine; cowboy hat, baseball caps, safari hat, coon tail hat(like Daniel Boone's), top hat, etc.
After we would say our prayers and tuck him in, then returning to check on him, Randal would have on a hat and be sound asleep.
Night after night, when we would go back in to check on him, sound asleep, yet a DIFFERENT hat on his sleeping head. After about two weeks, one day at nap time, I laid across his bed to rest with him. I thought to ask him about the different hats at night. He told me
"different hats for different dreams, mom". Just like I should have known....

Amber (my daughter) three years old...
She LOVED her pacifier! By three years old we were putting the pacie up until a car ride, nap time or night time bed time. If she wanted it in-between she knew she had to go lay down in the bed to get it and sometimes she'd just take a "pacie break", get it off her dresser and lay down on her bed, all by herself, just knowing the rules. Now, that you have the picture of the love affair between her and her pacie...
One day Nick and I went to pick the kids up from my mother's house. They had been there for a few days, for a visit. Of course as all kids do when they were reunited with us they instantly got whiney and irritable with each other and anyone else that entered their paths. We got them all strapped into the back seats, and were settled in to travel. Randal reached over and popped Amber's pacie out of her mouth by the ring. She squeals, and whines. Puts it back in her mouth after retrieving it, and the aggravating brother does it again! As this happens a few times, and Nick and I are so glad to be with them again, we still are looking forward, and are hoping this too shall pass... we hear........ from our angelic, presious, tiny three year old's mouth....
Amber takes her pacie out, looks at 6 year old Randal, and says......
"If you don't leave my pacie alone, I will make your life a living hell." ?????!!!!!!!!
Exact words.
Randal was speechless, Nick and I was STUNNED...where did that come from???
Of course, we knew, she'd been with her Mimi a few days!!!hahahaha
We never addressed it, how could we? We were trying so hard to hide our laughter! We sure didn't want her to repeat that at Mother's Day Out or Sunday School when another child irritated her!
Mimi says she never said that around her, it was probably on one of her soap operas one of those days. Yeah right. hahahaha
Yeah, from early on we knew Amber could and would, speak her mind if the situation calls for it!
After all, she is her Mimi's granddaughter.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Hero

I have a cup of coffee in my hand.
I'm sitting on the porch which is located in LA...Lower Arkansas.
The rain still patters off the tin roof.
I look over at the empty chair on the other side of the table, and I can visualize my father-in-law sitting there with his cup of coffee. Looking over the fields before us, listening for moving animals in the bush close by.
He and I shared many moments like that...
Bob loved this farm.
Even in his last months during his chemo/radiation treatments, I'd go into town and drive him down here and he'd ramble around adjusting clutches on tractors, making his way at his slower speed.
A true pillar of strength, cancer his only enemy.

With father's day coming up, and me, here at the Farm... if I believed in spirits remaining...Bob would be here.
Perhaps he gets to visit sometimes.
I can close my eyes and see his little silver truck coming up the dirt road with dust billowing behind it. I can hear "Mornin' Girl! Got coffee made?"

As I reflect on my memories of Bob, it amazes me it's the last memories that invoke the strongest feelings for him. Not because of his tragic, suffering death, but because of his strong enduring spirit. The horrific pain that he must have had, and his determination to be strong.
Bob was always strong, and responsible, and dependable.
A trait of course I cherished of Bob was his ability to laugh! Oh, how he loved to tell stories....many stories....many, many stories. Most of his stories sparked laughter from him, and his big belly would rise and fall with each snicker.
On father's day, since we've had the farm, Nick always had a shrimp boil and had the family down, Bob sitting in the center chair of the circle. It never being said, but everyone knowing who the "big dog" of father's day was.

He was a hero of mine. Hero's are never perfect, but they bring on feelings of safe.
Bob helped us all feel safe.
We are so blessed to have his legacy of responsibility, dependable, and strong!

I'm extra blessed, because he passed all that to his son, my husband. I see my husband with all the same wonderful traits of his Dad, that I admired.

Bob was more to me than a father-in-law, he was like my Dad.

On this father's day, I will hold my coffee cup up and drink with him in spirit.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Whatcha goin to do?

The last few days I have come in contact with a couple of people that have made me think of what I'm gonna be like when I'm 70 something...

First one: She's dressed really cute, smiley, and during our talk she tells me of a group of friends she has that meet together and they eat and play games once a week or more if they want. Her grown grandson even makes a comment, "don't you eat with family anymore?" He wanted her company so badly, yet she wasn't just hanging on to family for dear life. Therefore she's interesting to family, gives them something to talk about...friends, games, etc.

Second one: She dressed without much care. During our brief talk, I heard how depressing it was to be retired. How she doesn't have much contact with others.
Her husband is sick, her sister died 4 years ago and the nephew from her wrote her a thank you note for a graduation gift sent to him and addressed the note Mr. and Mrs.
not aunt and uncle. She said the sister that died was the "one" in the family that pulled everyone together, and how no one comes to see them now, not even her own children. The grandchildren she retired to keep have grown up and gone their way.
A daughter -in- law doesn't know them, and acts like she doesn't want to know them, polite, yet stand-offish.

Ok, People, which one will you be???????

Will you see old age as a time to say what you want, play what you want, spend time with who you want???

Of course this does go back to who we are throughout our lives.

Are you one to pick up the phone and create your own invites?
Or do you wait for the phone to ring and be invited?

Do you call a friend and hang up not really knowing what that friend is doing, or thinking?
Do you only relate what is relevant in your life? Or do you pull that friend into yours?
Do you find interest in others that are different from you?
Do you listen to the World News, and make yourself knowledgeable, interesting, and current?
Do you hold grudges and pout with the passive aggressive ways, stewing inside that no one does you right?

You know the old saying "Be a friend to have a friend", it's true all of our lives...even in our golden years. Even for family, especially as everyone gets grown and can actually choose which aunt to go see...haha!
So, come on ladies! Figure it out! If your phones not ringing now...

it will ring less later!



Saturday, June 6, 2009

Showers....Gifts Galore!


Today,
a wedding shower for a dear friend's daughter.

Friends gather to put out food made with our own hands on fancy plates, flowers arranged to create the "awww" effect.
Punch, ice water in a beautiful crystal decanter.
The gift giving, the ribbons saved,
the paper torn off and tossed aside.
The gifts are displayed on another beautiful table with care.
All the while, smiles and hugs and "oo's" and "aww's" being shared.

I stand aside and watch the room.
No matter what kind of shower we are providing, wedding or baby shower,
our group of girls delight in the new anticipated happiness for the recipient.
Our group of friends hold hands
and dry each others tears at funerals that we have to attend.

These women have heart.

I'm so happy that through this chapter of my life God has provided me with
this group.
Everyone is not of the same denomination of church.
Some are loud and obnoxious
(like me and a few others)
Some are quiet.
Some are more comfortable financially.
Some are not.
Some came from the country.
Some are city girls.
Some are real prayer warriors,
and those that aren't have strength in other areas as needed.

Ok, now let's really get to it...we love laughs!
Each one has their own struggles, their own fights against life,
but give us one little tidbit of laughter and we LOVE it!
We can take one CRAZY episode out of our daily encounters,
and run with it!
Sure, holding the hands, drying the tears, and strengthening each other throughout troubled times is so important.
But, without the laughter that would get dry, dull, and very depressing.
I love our mixture!


Today as I saw faces enter the room that no longer work along side us,
I realize their chapter ended with us at work but will forever be a part of us.

Yes, we have heart.
Caring.
Empathy,
and true love.
I'm so glad I have my girls...they are MY gift, each day.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Summer..... It Is!!!!!!!

You know it's summer when the metal part of the seat belt in your vehicle
can cause a 3rd degree burn.

The summer tomatoes, followed by the pea crops, and then the watermelons!
OMiGosh!
The smell of fresh mowed lawns, chlorine water by the pools.
Bugs and spiders, and mosquitos everywhere!
Red wasp, honey bees, and don't you dare smile while riding the four wheelers or boats or you'll get
teeth full of bugs.
The daylight lasts so much longer.
With everything buzzing, flying, growing, there's just more energy in the air!
Except for the mid afternoon til after dinner time.
The real steamy time of day that all of it slows down and stops.
Time to nap with a humming fan, blowing.
I love summer!


Saturday, May 9, 2009

My Mom!



I don't really know what angle to write this story from, should I tell in "general" or tell "details"??
With details this could be very lengthy, there's so much to say about my Mom. So, I'm just gonna begin and see where this goes.

There was never a day that you'd walk into my Mom's house and not smell wonderful food cooking.
She was a round, jolly, wonderful cook, that was never too busy to sit and laugh and talk with whoever came into her home. Her house always had people coming and going. She welcomed people so whole heartily they returned just to hear her laughter, and eat her good food.
When you were in my Mom's presence she made you feel good about who you were.

In the years of me being a teenager, Mom smoked skinny brown cigarettes and cussed like a sailor. Always with a rip-roaring laughter to back it all up! Always up for a practical joke, she was just a person people liked!

We always had extra people for every holiday or just on any day...people she'd met that had no where to go for the holiday she'd invite them to eat with us. How may Christmas's we'd find us running to the store last minute to get some extra socks to wrap or books or something for Mom's friends she'd invited in. Mom got mail and visits, from people for years that had lived in one of her rent houses that she'd helped through tough times.

Mom had a teenage girl through the 1950's, another teenage girl through the 1960's, then me as a teenage girl in the 1970's... she saw times change a lot. She just rolled with the changes...
She never talked of the past. I asked her questions of things and she'd answer my questions but always said, "I don't' like old stuff, antiques are just old stuff, I like new stuff. Let's not talk of the old times let's look to the new times."
When I'd fuss at her about something, and she didn't agree, her famous saying was"BLOW IT OUT YOUR ASS"HAHAHA Even in writing this, I want to laugh out loud!

Mom was my biggest cheerleader! Any time I needed to feel loved, she was my safe place.
My kids called her "Mimi" and she loved them as much as I do. She was always ready to brag about them to anyone that would listen, wherever she was!

Mom and I were very different, yet very alike. She had many challenging things in her life that formed her into such an interesting character. Her resilience was amazing!

Four years ago this month, Mom died.
A part of me died too. The part that was so intertwined with her laugh, her hands, her smell.

I'll always...always, love my mom.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Fever...

I'm sitting at the desk at the computer, and I get chilled to the bone.
Perhaps I have the thermostat turned too low.
I change it and go back to the computer.
A few moments pass and I begin to shake, and my teeth start chattering.
OK, this is not normal, I get my winter robe and put it on and get under the warmest blanket I can find.
I continue to shake. While shaking and teeth chattering, I notice the aching shoulders, and back. Uh-oh.
I got the thermometer out of the cabinet and took my temp, 101.
Throughout the night, the fitful sleep, the shaking, the teeth chattering, plus a sick stomach.
I switch the TV on periodically to have noise to distract me from the aches.

Swine flu all over the TV. People wearing masks.
I turn the TV off.

Things worsen, but then turn around. I take my temp, 100.
Thermometers are so good to show you that you are getting better.
I feel somewhat better. Another hour goes by and I take my temp again, 99.5.
Going down.
Finally, another hour or so, temp 98.6!
Yea! For thermometers!

I have found out over the years, I'm not one that likes being alone when sick. When I was young my mom always made me a bed on the couch when I was sick, in the middle of everything going on. She would let me lay in her lap and I'd smell Jergens lotion, and onions(she was always cooking and chopped onions for everything she cooked).
Right now I can close my eyes and see her loving hands.

So, just another sick day, a wasted 24 hours.
What a wasted day.
A whole 24 hours I'll never get back.
No smiles in 24 hours.

But, only 24 hours...
Tomorrow will have to be double happy, double fun!